...how.do.you.get.a.cold.when.it's.80.degrees.out?

i had a profusely important exam today at 4:00. i took off work a bit early and headed to the library to study and fell asleep on the couch around 3:15. i awoke to jessica yelling "why didn't you show up to take the exam today?!" i awoke in a mad frenzy and did my fair share of freaking out and wondering how life would work out homeless without a job or degree. then i noticed it was 3:30...

...jessica is not a very nice person :P

went skating with my boys--davis and blake--today... davis brought waffles and a toaster to the skatepark. oh, and just in case there was a shortage of electricity, he pre-nuked about 10 chocolate chip waffles and brought those in a tupperware container.

mike--whose real name is allegedly "brianna"--sat down next to me, looked down at the tupperware container, and looked back up at me...
"are those... waffles?"
"yep."
"suh-weeeet!"

heh, i'm definately gonna miss my crazy, weird, amazing friends when i move to mo-town. it was a killer skate session until davis rolled his ankle.

i think shawn and i are headed up to mo-town in the morning. shawn is going to be a lab-rat for drug testing and i am going to work on our place with my brothah, keith, all weekend.

i'll close with some random thoughts that came up with a friend about an angry neo-athiest philosopher:

If nothing greater than humanity existed, debate may be quite productive.

But the Bible is not about humanity, the Bible is about God.

Anyone can misquote scripture, pull some stuff out of context, and feel very intelligent and self-righteous about themselves.

I’m not interested in debate. Neither is God.

I’m interested in dealing with sin, and creating a new humanity.

--this teacher-- is not interested in dealing with sin, he’s interested in ignoring it.

I’m interested in loving, living, becoming a better person, and pleasing God with my life.

We’ve all sinned, we’re all dying, the world is broken… we all know this.

I’m interested in destroying sin, ending death, and healing the earth, and Jesus Christ is bringing that together quite beautifully, while --this teacher-- is fussing about why he’s not responsible for believing in God…

I’m not interested in some angst-filled old man ranting about how mean God is like a five year old throwing a tantrum about his dad that won’t let him eat ice cream for breakfast.

This debate offers nothing but an attitude that is egotistical. Selfish. Prideful. Angry.

It is about not seeking help. Is about not admitting our own brokenness. Is about not taking part in the healing of the world. It ignores every important issue in life that matters. I am more interested in feeding children without food… arguing that God does not exist does not fill their stomachs. I’m more interested in my friends who feel hopeless in bondage to alcohol and addictions to drugs… Jesus Christ is resurrection, redemption, renewel and freedom. That’s a gospel I believe in. Arguing God does not exist does not liberate my friends from their bondage or their depression. I’m more interested in a meaningful life. Jesus Christ is giving me a reason to live, a purpose to wake up in the morning that is larger than me or my ego. Arguing God does not exist casts the world into a meaningless fatalistic hopelessness. I believe in hope. I believe in resurrection. I believe in redemption. I believe humanity is going somewhere.

If you’re looking for “arguments” supporting the faith, check out “The Reason for God” by Dr. Timothy Keller. There is a plethora of resources available. But I’m not interested in those either, really… God is true. Jesus is true. Resurrection is true. Love is true. That is what I want my life to be about. Angst-filled human conjecture and opinion holds no answers for me. No truth, just pride.

Those conversations are destructive. They are one sided. They are hurtful.

The conversations point to a belief system. It appears rooted in anger, pride, and destructive lies. I do not see how those conversations are helping the world, advancing humanity, or solving sin problems, freeing those in bondage from their addictions, or feeding the hungry, clothing the poor, or giving justice to the weak and the oppressed. That belief system is not big enough for me, or God, or the rest of the world.

It’s easy to doubt. Anyone can doubt. But if we hunger for the truth, we should doubt our doubt. We should test and scrutinize and doubt our doubts just as intensely as we doubt our beliefs. Because our doubt is a belief system, and if it were true, we could bring it into the light and call it what it is, call it truth, and show it as beautiful and meaningful and life changing. But doubts do not hold up to the beauty and the truth of redemption and resurrection and new life and freedom and love and justice that Jesus Christ embodies.

If you doubt God’s love, then you must prove it and test it. And when I look at the times He has given me life when I should have been dead. When he has freed me from addictions. When he has healed broken marriages. When he has given hope and peace to those who have none. When he has given life abundantly. When I look at my friends and my life and the beauty of the sky and the warmth of the sun… and ultimately when I look at the Cross upon which He suffered for all of humanity, I see His love. I see His truth. I see beauty. I see resurrection. I see life.

And the truth of Jesus Christ pulls a Chuck Norris on my doubt, because there is no “doubt” in my mind that Jesus Christ loves me. My entire life has been a tragedy that he is speaking joy into. He has endlessly, relentlessly pursued me while I've tried to give him the finger and run to the hell of my own destruction.

I have experienced hate and anger and pride and addiction. I do not enjoy them. They leave me enslaved. Depressed. Meaningless. Hopeless. And they do nothing for the rest of the world. They add nothing to beauty, to creativity, to music, to art, to love, to community, to everything that is of God.

I believe in resurrection. I believe in life. I believe in love. I have experienced all of these things. And I enjoy them. I trust them. I have faith in them. I have faith in Jesus Christ.

I have a faith that is going somewhere. I know a God that is up to something in the world. I live a life that is full of undeserved, indescribable joy even in the midst of suffering.

I believe in God.